Face crack of the century can’t describe the feeling when seeing old remnants from our past showing up in random places of our new beginnings. At the time it seemed like everything was going fine, we got comfortable in our new “now”, and we thought we buried all those things that made up our yesterday then “Bam” it’s right there in your face in another form as a nagging reminder. I want to encourage you to stop running away from your past allowing it power to control your now, and giving it the authority of determining your future!
All Goodbyes Aren’t Forever
It seemed like at the turn of the year that although my theme for the New Year was “Remove, Rebuild, and Restore” I kept running into many people from my past back to back shortly beginning in January. These weren’t just random people from my past. They were those connections from people where the endings were left far from a good note! I received social media requests from those friendships that ended sour, two ex boyfriends from college, a playdate mom which ended weird, a few former co-workers from a job I later resigned from, and a few former church memebers where the relationship I felt at the time was strained from no longer attending the church.
Whew! What was God doing to me? I had no intentions of connecting back with many of those people again after hurt, betrayal, and disappointments. My mind became uneasy and extra caution thinking that none of this would mean me any good. Boy, was I wrong! I took off my running shoes and trusted God more who was the orchestrator of it all. I will never know how he was working on them, but I saw how he was working on me. Romans 8:28 shows how God can make the must difficult of situations work for our good.
Many of us wish parts of our past were sketched on a dry easer board. All we would have to do is wipe it clean with a cloth moving on about our lives as if nothing happened. If I had a bucket of all the bad habits and “use to’s” from the past it would overflow spilling on the ground. Just think about it. If we only knew what we knew now, we would’ve never connected with some as friends or got romantically involved with others. We would’ve never been so vulnerable, we would’ve kept our distance, and we would’ve said a big “No” before going out on that date.
But I Use To & They Knew Back When
The words that came out of my mouth weren’t always clean, not every path walked was straight, some circles weren’t the best for me, and I didn’t always act my best in handling some situations. As my personal relationship grew in Christ, and my spiritual maturity improved I begin letting go of some of those negative things from my past. However, there was always a linger of gulit of what I use to do or running into those who knew me in a different light. If I had a slip up the weight of gulit and shame would feel even burdensome. God’s word answered in the book of Isaiah 43: 18-19 soothed my weary spirit. God knows our past, our deepest secrets, and or darkest places. Jesus died for our sins, and his covering through the Holy Spirit is greater than any smear campaign. God delivers us from our past, and will evolve us into the “new” if we’re willing to be obedient . Walk foward boldy without looking back. When you fall off repent confessing your sins to him, get right back up, ask him for strength along with guidance not allowing your past to control your future.
Live, Learn, Grow
We can choose to learn from our past, or we can choose to dwell on our past. We can choose to forgive others, or we can hold unto bitterness allowing it to fester in our soul. We can choose to forgive ourselves removing the damaging control of guilt and shame. We don’t have to walk in a pitty party reliving every bad decision made. God can restore our souls, and he can mend the most conflicted of relationships. I witnessed how God restored peace and closure in many of the relationships mentioned early. The other relationships I saw him humble me in taking owership for my part in some situations, learning how to not take everything personal, and working on me in releasing bitterness.
I See You
Don’t run from your past; your past is your testimony. Use it to witness of God’s goodness. Next time you see a “ghost from your past” don’t run. See it for what it was embracing the new growth through God’s deliverance in bringing you to your now. Learn from the past, and be wiser in future scenarios. Don’t run, and be bold saying ” Hello Past! I see you.” Be no longer afraid or controlled by your past trusting in the Lord who has this all in his divine plan working it out in the long term for your good.