There comes a point when every mother witnesses the transition of her once baby boy growing into his own in transitioning into manhood. There are some transitions in between the season of the big “M” word mothers along with their sons try their best to adjust to in allowing their sons to evolve into becoming their own. My son and I almost look eye to eye in height , and he is for sure to remind me of his growth in navigating through puberty. His shoulders are strecthing wider, and he’s growing taller. His voice still with a hint of squeakness is growing deeper where as when I hear him over the phone I pause in asking myself ” Is this my baby boy?”
We’ve came a long way from the bouncy active toddler years, survived the roller coaster childhood years, saw major improvements oddly through adolescent years, and now we are moving on to the teenage years. Yeah, no more Garanimals gear and baseball caps! The heart sunken moments of catching him as a mother playing in the mud has gone into him throwing his own clothes in the washer. The child who others saw and would always tell me ” Mama, he sure is all boy!” has now settled into a calm leader who loves to help others.
It’s been years since I laid out his clothes for the next morning. I can introduce him to ” prospective” friendships, but he chooses to cultivate his own friendships now with like minded buddies. I cook breakfast, and lay out snacks to later see him select his own. Our conversations about superheroes have now grown to major commentary on world events. He oftentimes shares passionately about events that effect him as a young man of color navigating in a society that now sees him not as the cute little boy wearing a baseball cap, but as a possible threat. Yes, he talks about his friends, but he is sure to ask my advice on how to bashfully handle his “crushes” at school. I use to feel that my son who was so stubborn at times was totally aloof to the daily struggles I faced in balancing it all in raising him and his younger sisters. I now have him tap me on the shoulders to share with me that he has already taken out the trash before I could ask, and he later asks can he help with the dishes.
We take it day by day as mother and son as he graduates from one chapter to another in growing into manhood. I don’t place him on a pedestal in not being allowed to have bad days or make mistakes. I’m aware that the pressure of being perfect is unrealistic in growing as a teen, but I pray that he will apply the lessons we’ve taught him at home. His father and stepfather do a good job in leading by example on how to be a man the best way they can. I don’t take that away from them in being overbearing, but he’ll tell someone before I will that he is a proud mama’s boy. However, mama’s boys and those who love them know to not to interfere with the growing independence in learning how to be a man. I will always see the bright eyed little boy running to hug me to later hold my hand, but I am proud to say as well that I am happy to see my son grow into a man.