Each one of us has a unique story along with having various other details about our personal lives that we have a choice to disclose. Depending on our personalities and preferences some of us are more transparent naturally in sharing with others. I am for the most part an open person, but I have learned that even in openness that we should guard our hearts in protecting our stories in our journeys.
I have a very dear friend that says in her words, ” I have a girlfriend spirit” in making others feel comfortable in sharing about themselves. She always asks me what new friend I’ve met from my playground adventures with the kids in connecting with another mother in having a good conversation. I don’t know about you, but depending on the moment I have experienced some small talks venture into therapy sessions, but who am I to judge. There are moments where we are more vulnerable which can easily allow us to spill our own tea, but I would warn you that we must make sure who we’re talking to in sipping all that we are brewing out of our mouths with discussions of our personal lives. It feel good to finally get our truths out in the moment, but we also don’t want to regret it later.
Everything Isn’t For Everybody
There’s a testimony within each one of us, but it may not be for us to share it in a public forum randomly. The work setting can grow to be a difficult environment to be in when we use it to share certain events from our personal lives. Although we aren’t to be judge and jury of the lives of others, it’s common tendency for us as humans after learning the juicy details of someone’s life they’ve shared to formulate our thoughts and opinions. We open ourselves up to that when we aren’t wise with whom we are speaking to about sensitive areas of our lives. There are also people who mean us no good after learning what we’ve shared in what we thought was a transparent moment in connecting that they would later use merely as gossip. I ‘ve encountered people with whom I thought were good friends or trusted family members that I later regretted being so open with in experiencing not so positive results after pretty much pouring out my heart. I once dated a guy who shared some very private details about his exes that I’m sure those women shared with him in trust, and I knew if we ever went further along in things going down south he would’ve done the same thing to me in revenge. Have you ever had someone share some pretty intimate things about someone else that if the other person knew about it, they probably wouldn’t be to happy with? We must remember that not everyone has the character, maturity, and the care to listen to us share certain things about our lives, so we shouldn’t give those individuals the privilege to hear our story.
Ask yourself these questions in guarding your heart before you disclose certain things about your life:
How well do I know this person?
Am I emotionally dumping on this person?
What is my purpose in sharing ________ with this person?
Will what I am sharing inflict harm or anything negative about anyone else especially my children, family, friend, co-worker, or someone with whom I have a close interaction with?
Does the person I’m sharing with have godly character, maturity, concern, and my best well being from learning my disclosure?
Although, I am a talker when I want to be, I can say I have a select few in being confidants. I also share certain things with specific people in understanding the familiarity of our relationship. It’s my personal ministry to connect with others in sharing my story. I however take an account of what I’m sharing in protecting my family and those I’m involved with closely with respect. I don’t believe we should be tight lip and sealed in keeping ourselves permanently closed off from everyone in sharing. There are some occasions where we are to be open with our truth, and we should allow others in especially those we know mean us well. I’ve met some awesome people in having the most wonderful connections throughout in sharing different parts of my life, but I can tell you from lessons learned to always guard your heart.