I can recall my grandmother saying in a sweet, southern, yet serious tone,”It’s not what you do, but how you do it.” I reflect on that from trials, errors, and later triumphs from lessons learned from understanding how to let go in peace with leaving minimum collateral damage. The way we live our lives in how we interact with others along with making needed changes that are best for us doesn’t have to be a stream of contentious experiences. We have permission to let go, move forward, and grow in all the ways God calls us to be. We can go forth in being obedient in letting go with peace.
For I know the plans I have for you, “declares the Lord,”plans to prosper you, and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29: 11
I believe when God begins to work in our lives in making changes he does so through removing, rebuilding, and restoring. There will be times where we will be hit involuntary through the removal process, and there will be times that we must trust God through trusting in our faith through Jesus in having the courage in removing things ourselves. This is part two of my series “Transformation Journey” You can read part one of the series by clicking the following link.https://purposefilledmommywithminimarie.com/2019/01/06/release-what-releases-you-the-art-of-moving-on
The Difference Between Running Away & Letting Go
There’s a big difference from running away than letting go. I’ve had my share of failed attempts in my past in not handling situations as delicate with tact in not knowing the difference between running away, acting in emotions, and having the courage in letting go what wasn’t best for me in specific moments in my life. The reason for a lot of these mistakes was being afraid to confront conflict, not knowing how to effectively handle conflict, and not having the best examples growing up in seeing how to work through conflicts. You live you learn and you grow. It’s best to suck it up, get the nerve, and talk to a loved one in sharing with seems like an ongoing offense which pierces your heart than letting it blow up from what’s been festering. It’s best for your future to put in a two weeks notice for even the most toxic work environments. Give it all you got in an endeavor before throwing in the towel. Speak with clear conciousness, intention, and from guided prayer with a trusted church leader before you leave the church for the long journey to church hopping. Have a heart to heart with a dear friend before you count them out in cutting them off as a bad friend. There was always an unsettling feeling in the pit of my gut when I knew deep down in my heart I laced up my shoes in running away from something, or if I knew I didn’t handle things correctly.I felt a sense of peaceful closure when acting on sound mind in letting go than the contradiction of running away.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petitions, with thanksgivings, present your requests to God. Philippians 4: 6
You Don’t Have To Stay
I am by no means telling you to bite the bullet in staying in anything that you feel is unhealthy, detrimental, draining, or you know deep down you’ve evolved from in it no longer serving a purpose in your life. We have permission to let go of what we feel is best for us. It’s great to have life long friends, but the truth is some friendships will run their course. There will be some connections that do more harm than good, and you may have to cut ties with those connections. No one enters a marriage on thinking that it won’t last forever. However, many divorcees like myself will share the heartbreaking tales in being in marriages that didn’t stay true to their vows of love, monogamy, honor, protection, and respect where they made the difficult the decision after much effort in trying to make it work of ending it. There are some jobs that we know we dred to enter in each day, and we know that it would be best to leave for a more regarding career. It takes time and a few goodbyes to discover a church that’s a good fit spiritually in growth, connection, sound biblical doctrine, and which acts in full missionary service to those in need for you and your family to be apart of. Lastly, social media has been around for over decade. Most of us don’t have the same Facebook friends, Instagram followers, and etc that we started with from the beginning. Also, who’s even on Myspace?
Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland. Isaiah 43: 18-19
I say all that in encouraging you to consider the following questions before you make the decision to quickly remove anything or anyone from your life. I love the question, “What would Jesus do?” Reflect on these thoughts in your transformation in growing more like Christ, and may you live a life of intention.
Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise being calm in the end. Proverbs 29: 11
- Did you go into prayer with God before making the decision to release what you’re about to let go of?
- What scriptures did you study that best fit your situation in confirmation of removing yourself from this situation or person?
- Are you acting from, anger resentment, fear, envy, or hatred or are clear conciousness? Never operate from your feelings or emotions alone.
- Are you feeling peer pressured to do something that deep down you know isn’t right? Be sure to be guided in actions by people who aren’t acting with selfish motives or intentions in receiving advice. Also we can create enablers by the narrative we share.
- Are you acting from a place of malice, anger, frustration, resentment, or intent to cause harm in letting go? Be very honest with yourself before any action in operating strategically and not out of spite. You don’t have villianize every person or place you disconnect from.
- Are you being honest with yourself regarding the whole scenario? It’s best to view things 360° in reflection before magnifying things larger than what they actually are.
- What will you gain within the removal process of this situation? What would you loose if any? Please take the time to weigh the pros and cons.
- Ask yourself, ” Is this truly what God deems is best for me?” You must take the time to study, pray, reflect on the word of God to know where he is guiding in direction for your path.
It may seem impossible in the moment, it is possible to move forward in letting go on a good note. May you go forth in peace in all you do. Be blessed beautiful people.
Check out my Sunday Reflection Facebook Chat on this topic by clicking the link below.