Being Authentic, Spiritual Growth and Understanding

Forgiveness Is A Gift For You

I learned more about the gift of grace in my parenting journey in witnessing that it goes to a depth of compassion that words can’t describe. Many of us as parents are able to offer a loving pardon of forgiveness when one of our children falls short. It’s like without saying a word verbatim I can look at one of my kids after a mishap in us both coming to terms knowing there’s love, forgiveness, and we’re good in doing our best to move on from whatever happened. I’m keeping it honest in sharing that it’s not as easy to forgive and forget with some situations like it is with my little brood.  We may experience in our lives a situation that was hurtful where a formal apology will never be given, but God is saying to us to release it in trusting him with forgiveness of the apology that was truly never given.

Psalms 86:5  

You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you.

There maybe many reasons why we wouldn’t receive the apology we deserve by someone in a hurt, offense, or disappointment. I ‘ve listed a few, but please don’t view these examples as any excuse for what was done:

  • The person refuses to take ownership for their actions.
  • The person honestly is unaware that any offense or hurt on their part was done.
  • The person is deceased or incapacitated for medical reasons in not being able to communicate an apology.
  • The person is acutely aware of their harmful actions, yet they haven’t come to terms on how to articulate a sincere apology for their actions of harm or offense.

Let The Healing Journey Begin

I started a three-part series on healing in my blog this season with the hopes of encouraging others as, I have made progress through my healing journey through divorce in sharing a breakthrough of recovery. You can click the link for the first blog of this series 

Mark 11:25

And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.

Forgiveness Is A Gift for You

A few weeks ago, I received a surprising email from someone who has caused much pain in my life with a short snippet of a vague apology. The email was less than two sentences from all that has transpired from this particular person of all the hurt and pain they’d caused along with continuing in behavior, but it was something that I never thought I would receive. I could’ve dissected it for it’s weight in a search for gold, but it wasn’t worth it. I could’ve critiqued it for its lack of depth for all that was done, but it wasn’t worth it.  I could have sent a sassy reply back asking for the person to be more detailed, but it wasn’t worth the energy in knowing that the connection after the pain they’d caused dissolved all hopes of reconciliation. This person will never know that for years I’ve been praying for them in the hopes that one day they would be delivered to walk in their truth for what they did, deliverance from their internal bondage that made them act the way they did towards me, and for repentance of their actions. Your situation may or may not be as deep as to what transpired regarding that hurtful offense that happened towards me, but the truth is we will one day have to accept in some way an apology that was never truly giving. The forgiveness isn’t an off the hook pass for them; forgiveness is a gift of peace for you rather than wallowing in bitterness.

Your Gift

 I’ve learned for my own peace and sanity to forgive people anyways. I learned in prayer to pray for those who’ve hurt me out loud by name until it hits that there is no longer a sting in my heart towards them. Forgiveness doesn’t mean a relationship will be the same or restored. Forgiveness doesn’t mean we forget. The more we ruminate on an offense however in retelling it to others or ourselves without the intention of healing we waste the precious gift of new beginnings. We hold ourselves in an emotional prison of pain when we refuse to let go in letting God handle the hurts and hang ups of walking into unforgiveness towards others. We also give those individuals power over our thoughts, lives, and interactions with others when we hold on to unforgiveness. I noticed when I opened the door in offering forgiveness in various situations in my life that it in turn opened the door for many other blessings. We may not receive a formal apology or an in-depth apology from someone who hurt us, but that doesn’t mean we don’t owe ourselves the gift of forgiveness in having a fresh start for a healthy healing journey of release.

2 thoughts on “Forgiveness Is A Gift For You”

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