We’ve all had our moments as mothers when it seems like everything arounds us is anarchy despite our guidance or instruction. It’s like we’re speaking martian to otherwise humans of the most common of household tasks. We’ve done our best to remain calm with a smile while tripping over toys on the floor, wiping toothpaste from the sank, constantly putting the toilet seat down, and vacuuming a beach load of mystery debris of unknown particles. Finally, after cleaning up the living room for the 20th time in a day while hearing screaming chaos we shout ” I’ve have it officially!” The room suddenly gets quiet out of fear that it’s about to go down .
Don’t be caught off guard by the deer in headlight looks from everyone in the house when you start laying down the law from the chaos. There will be times when our kids along with our spouse get a little bit too comfortable in seeing us take on the load. Kids will always test the waters, and our spouses can become self absorbed with their needs. We can find ourselves easily picking up the weight and following through with all that is around us to just “get it out of the way”. We have to protect ourselves from taking on the martyr personality of doing everything and not holding anyone accountable ,yet feeling resentful inside of bearing such an impractical nuisance. Every able bodied individual in the home with the exception of infants can pull their weight in some way. There’s rarely a home that has children where you enter in, and you can hear a pin drop on the floor. At any rate you don’t have to scream in having a conversation with an adult as if you’re at the latest night spot! Yes, kids will be kids, and most spouses wouldn’t go through the intricate details of cleaning and management. Nevertheless, don’t get swept in guilt for calling everyone out in love to get your house back under control.
Release and Delegate
We can empower ourselves by releasing some of the responsibilities through delegating away each able person can contribute to help keep the ship from sinking. We can stay afloat by establishing household rules and standards that together everyone abides in. We can support a collaborative household effort of responsibilities and expectations by holding everyone accountable in loving assertiveness. No, we are not trying to be a warden over a prison facility. Be that as it may, a mother shouldn’t feel anyway convicted for wanting the best for her family especially with the acute understanding that everyone can partake in the shared order of peace.
Keep your cool and your sanity:
- When you see thing getting out of hand call a sit down.
- Make everyone aware of the expectations, house rules, and living standards that everyone will play apart in maintaining.
- Delegate in having having everyone pitch in. Feel free to post it if necessary
- Hold everyone accountable through assertiveness with known consequences of their actions in not following through.
- Don’t take on the martyr personality in making everyone feel guilty when you have not set any boundaries or expectations.
- Have a cool down before you have a meltdown. Find you some place in or out the home that makes you feel at peace so that you can regroup.
- Find a trusted friend to talk to when it seem stressful and overwhelming.
- Find a positive outlet to release tension and stress that you enjoy.
- Always speak in love. Don’t allow your frustrations or emotions to take control.
- Know that you are entitled to have an occasional “moment ” as a mother so don’t feel guilty or ashamed . The best of us will have our bad days simply revise regroup and refocus.