They Said What! : How To Stop Worrying About What Others Say For The Sensitive Soul

   Some of us can’t hide it. We are simply sensitive people. Guess what? Being sensitive isn’t nothing to be ashamed of.Sensitive people are not professional whinny dolls who drop bucket loads of tears after the slightest offense!  Those of us who are naturally sensitive are very in tune with the world around us within everyday responses and interactions. It’s how we respond or should I say not respond to those everyday interactions that helps us better control the beauty of our sensitivity rather than letting our emotions take over our lives in controlling us.  It is very possible for a person to be sensitive yet possess strength, control, poise, and composure in the most difficult of circumstances . They can also hold those same admired qualities in working with the most difficult people by showing grace and compassion without being on the constant defense. There is no respect per person in age or gender when it comes down to being a sensitive soul. Sensitive people tend to be very lovable, devoted,  passionate, and loyal  friends and lovers. They are very creative people, and they are very in tune with tapping into their creative genius than the average person. Sensitive people are very great listeners. They have an appreciation for the arts, nature, and they have a strong sense of improving the world around them in some way. Embrace your sensitive soul without the fear of it being a weakness.  

They Said What!

       It’s important to know how to control our emotions; we can’t allow our emotions to control us. Our natural instinct as sensitive people is to wear or feelings on our sleeves. It can be very emotionally draining and hurtful to combine being hyper sensitive, people pleasing, and a hot tempered in understanding daily interactions with others. What did she say? What did he mean? Wow, that really hurt my feelings!  Worrying about what others say and think about us will keep us living on the edge of uncertainty. Anyone who needs to seek constant approval by others in validation will live a life feeling hurt and disappointed. We can’t control what others think and feel about us. We can’t allow the opinions of others to hold more weight or worth than our personal view of ourselves . There will always be someone who feels the need to offer unwarranted criticism or a sharp jab that was meant to be cut deep.Those low blows don’t define who we are. Actually, the lower the blow that is being thrown your way shows more about that person’s true character than yours!  Keep it moving. Do your best to allow petty acts of negativity to roll off you like water off a ducks back.

The Sensitive Parent 

Its a parents natural instinct to protect their children from hurt. It can be even more challenging for sensitive parents in understanding what is reality and what is their natural protective reponse to shield their children from harm regardless of their age. When my children hurt I hurt. I feel their pain. Im like a lioness I am ready to pounce to protect her cubs. I learned to take in the full story in resolving conflicts with my children instead of acting on a half story or my assumptions. I also allow them to work through their minor conflicts without being the helicopter mom hovering over. Our children watch what we do so its important to be that silent role model for them especially if they are sensitive to.

Learning To Embrace My Inner Sensitivity
   

    If I am honest with myself with all the amazing challenges that I have been through and overcame from childhood through adulthood I would say that I am a pretty tough cookie! However, I have since a little girl with pigtails been a sensitive soul. I don’t hide or feel embarrassed by displaying  vulnerability. It helped me in many ways to become the woman I am today.  I can say that sensitive spirit that lives inside of me helped me with connecting to others in a very deep way being of service to those in need, excelling in music, performing arts, working with young people, and creative writing. I am told by others that I meet that they feel a sincere warmth from me that is real and genuine.  I am usually the friend that many would call when they need support or a warm hug. At the same time sadly, when it was the other way around at times I felt the double standard of  being called ” to sensitive” or that I should have ” thicker skin.”  Realistically our assets are only positive when it’s of convenience to others, so never take it personally.

     As, I ventured out in being more into the public eye in working in media and emceeing events around our city I felt not only pressured,  but I knew that a public platform also offers public critiques regardless if it’s was justified in being valid. I struggle with that to this day through walking out on faith in venturing in God’s purpose for my life in the hopes of spreading inspiration. The  various outlets in sharing my passion and ministry especially through social media are free to anyone’s  bold opinions at anytime. I am an extroverted / introvert so it can be nerve wreaking for me at times more than it may appear to put myself out there in the public view. However, I take it day by day in doing what I love and what I am passionate about.  I can tell you that following a divorce, failed business relations in the budding start of discovering my career, and sadly the ending of friendships not everyone would say wonderful things about me. Such is life! Most people never admit their flaws or faults when a relationship of any factor ends. You will always hear one side of a story. I’ve learned not to let the past define me . Being true to yourself flaws and all is authentic and genuine. There will always be more people that will love you than those who have issues with you. Focus on those that love, support, and celebrate you sincerely . Leave the past right where it is back behind you,and push forward with great expectation .  

Here are a few healthy tips for the sensitive soul to release the anxiety of what others think about them in owning their peace: 

  •  Always consider the source before taking anything to heart.
  • Be true to your naturally in tune feelings and observations but don’t base your actions on assumptions and perceptions. 
  • Despite the temptation never stoop low even if the lowest blow is being thrown your way. Honor your character.
  • Do your best to keep your emotional and physical composure even in the most difficult of challenges . It will work out better for your good. 
  • Remember everything wasn’t meant to be an attack, so don’t waste your life living on the defense. Don’t take everything personal.
  • Everything doesn’t deserve your attention for response .
  • Keep a healthy circle of close confidants that you can share your feeling with who will respect you, offer genuine advice, and helpful critiques if needed .
  •  Do not surround yourself with enablers who feed or follow into your every issue or concern when you know personally it lacks true validation . 
  • Protect your heart by not surrounding yourself around toxic personalities or those who have the tendency to bully others through intimation.
  •  Remember sometimes it’s you and your emotions and not the situation. Stay out of you feelings!
  •  Don’t find your power in playing the victim.
  •  Find a positive outlet to express your emotions and feelings such as journal writing, painting, yoga, dancing, culinary arts, and etc.

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